"THE IVERSON BICYCLE FACTORY STORY" ...Conclusion

Hi everyone-  getting ready to resume work on this blog, offering my own take on sports (especially my team, the Mets) as well as music, social commentary - and anything else I choose to comment upon.  In the meantime I am reposting "The Iverson Bicycle Factory Story- conclusion" for those who may have missed it.  See you all soon....:-) Stevenn
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Hi Friends!

My neighbor Tony was miserable at work, stressed to the max, and grappling with an important decision. Retirement or continue working? I was trying to explain to him why I had retired prematurely by telling him the story of the Iverson Bicycle Factory. It was the only way I could answer the question without revealing...personal details...I'd worked for the government. One never knows....

"What about retirement?" Tony asked. Again. "What about...retirement?" Frankly, I thought Tony should be a little more happy. He had the ear of a friendly neighbor and enough beer to wash away the stench of a very rough day. I looked at him. "Tony" I said, interrupting the story, "the other day I went to a gym in Manhattan. Some guy had gotten sick in the men's locker room. Brutal! Plus, there were no paper towels available nor toilet tissue. I went up to the maintenance guy. 'Can't right now.' he said. He was neatly folding a stack of white towels and placing them on a shelf. He repeated 'can't right now.' You see, corporate headquarters demanded that all of the incoming clean white towels be neatly stacked and placed on the shelf prior to any other work being done. The maintenance guy could be fired if he used his judgement and abandoned his assignment. He gave me a desperate look. If I reported the problem to his superiors he could be fired for neglecting the cleanliness of the locker room!"

Tony smiled. "You mean he couldn't neatly fold and stack the towels AND attend to the locker room?" I grabbed a beer for myself. It was time to finish the Iverson Bicycle Story. "I was happy for about a week working on the assembly line. The supervisor, John Collins, was a kind, older guy, about sixty-two, never married but supporting, as he put it 'about a half-dozen children in different places around the country'. Well- it wasn't my place to judge, right? John was a respectful, kind, supportive boss - not unintelligent - and very reasonable and encouraging. That's all I cared about for my minimum wage salary.

There were twenty guys on the assembly line. We each had a job to do as the bicycle moved down the line and eventually became a completed project. In my own case I had to bend down, take a screw and small pipe out of a box, and screw the pipe into part of the bike. It was repetitive and boring but I was able to keep up and felt good about myself. I was going to make it through the end of the summer! Maybe even make some money I could use when I returned to college. An extra slice of pizza. Another pitcher of beer! Maybe...just maybe...enough money for a date! (Actually that wasn't an issue. At that stage of my life I had a better chance of winning the lottery.) My fellow 'Assembly Liners' were pretty happy as well. The heat was horrible but- hey! We were actually building a bicycle! Something that would make someone very happy. Isn't that what it's all about?

Unfortunately, the situation quickly deteriorated. The following week ten guys - half the unit -were fired for stealing (and then selling) bicycle parts on the outside. The assembly line was a key operation - what to do? Local factory management - otherwise known as 'Those In Charge' -held a series of meetings. John Collins exited the final meeting. He cursed under his breath. They hadn't even asked his opinion. The unit supervisor. Decades of experience. Management's solution? Double-up on the tasks. That meant that I now had a two-part operation: reach over the side of the bicycle and screw another piece of pipe into the bicycle with another screw and pipe from the box. While the line was moving. And then return to my station to begin again. It was a damn good thing the line moved slowly!

Not for long. 'Those In Charge' got the bad news from Corporate Headquarters. Sales figures for the quarter were way down. Something needed to be done. Cut costs! and improve production. Once again John Collins exited the series of meetings scratching his head and muttering under his breath. The speed of the line was to be increased. Dramatically. (Of course the result was very much like that famous - or is it infamous? - scene in "I Love Lucy" where Lucy and Ethel have to stuff the candy in their mouths, their clothing, and under their caps in order to keep up with the assembly line.) So...guys tripping all over themselves in an effort to keep up. Cursing. More cursing. Bicycles arriving at the end of the line with pieces missing. And - sweating in the stifling heat, employees were drinking more water. (Or something stronger.) Resulting in more bathroom breaks. Absences from the line - and more bicycles incomplete. Even longer breaks and lunches. And even more incomplete bicycles.

Clearly additional staff was needed for the assembly line. If necessary, move staff in from other units. Right? WRONG! The solution 'Those In Charge' came up with to address declining production? - slow the speed of the line - but give an additional task to each person. Now I had to bend completely over the moving structure and screw a third pipe into the bicycle, using an additional screw and pipe from the box. Everyone on the line had three tasks. The result - almost all of the bicycles had to go through the assembly line twice - some them three times. A few - four times! Workers felt overwhelmed and unproductive. And angry. Very very angry...some took longer breaks. Others called in sick. Others simply quit - in the middle of a recession!

John Collins had had enough. He marched into the manager's office. We heard the argument through closed doors. John gave his two-week's notice and retired on what was most likely a relatively meager pension. I asked John about all that child support he was paying.'It's a nice summer day' he replied. 'Warm. Blue skies. Just a slight breeze. I'm going to the beach.' And then he left. For good. After forty years employment with the Iverson Bicycle Factory. I never saw him again.

Well...in the summer of 1975 the price of gasoline was fifty-six cents. A big increase from the twenty-five cents I'd paid just a few short years before. So - I really needed this money. And I tried to keep going. John's replacement was some guy named Eddie, not much older than myself - he had ideas. Lots and lots of great ideas. (None of his ideas involved reducing the number of employee tasks and/or adding staff. Or trying to convince 'Those In Charge' to do so.) Eddie had confidence. Tons of confidence! He met with us, told us the unit could succeed. Must succeed. Will succeed! We could - we will - do it. Yes we will! YESSS!

Left unsaid was that John Collins was to blame. The employees weren't getting the job done. Clearly someone had to be blamed (it couldn't possibly be 'Those In Charge'). We heard the whispers. John was too unwilling to 'think outside of the box'. He was too easy-going, too protective of his employees. He obviously coddled us - he was a coddler! A damn coddler! He didn't work us hard enough. And - John was unwilling (or unable) to successfully implement the helpful directives of 'Those In Charge'. Eddie? Within a week he was threatening to discipline employees and was in turn threatened with the loss of his own job. Productivity continued to decline. More employees disappeared..and so it went....

I couldn't take it anymore. The day came when I said to Eddie I wasn't returning to work. Did he ask me why? No - he told me that I'd never ever ever work in an Iverson Bicycle Factory again. Never!!! I thought a lot about Eddie's parting words. While I was at the beach. Soaking up the rays and taking in the scenery..."

I looked at Tony. "Got it?" He nodded. The story had helped. He thought for a moment. "What ever happened to your friend Larry - the one who started the job with you?"

"That's a story for another day" I replied as I walked Tony to the door. He had additional questions about the Iverson Bicycle Factory Story. "Not tonight." I said. "Time for dinner - and then I am going to work on my music and get ready for tomorrow." Tony left to think about his decision.

I was happy. "The Prisoner" would be proud - I hadn't divulged any classified and personal information regarding the reasons for my retirement...right??

I turned my attention to other things. Tony? For at least one more day, he would have to deal with the directives from 'Those In Charge'. Me? Tomorrow I am going to the beach. It's going to be a beautiful day!

See you all soon. Until then...

Stevenn